Tuesday, January 26, 2010
“ I try to talk to you, but I don't know what to say. I am afraid you don't want me to say anything. So I don't. But inside of me there are words waiting to come out.And tell you how I feel-like how I miss you. And how I love you despite my broken heart.And how I need you in my life. And especially how much miss you. And how I love you despite my broken heart.And how I need you in my life. And especially how much I want you.But those words may forver stay in my heart-locked inside.Sometimes I wonder if there are words locked inside you too... but I'll never know.”
Saturday, January 23, 2010
So, tonight I went to dinner and a movie with a friend and had a great time. The initial plan was to see Avatar in 3-d but it was sold out. So, we saw The Book of Eli instead. It was slow moving at times, especially in the beginning, but overall a good movie. One thing I love is movie previews. I could watch them all day long. So, here's a list of movies that are either coming up or recently in theaters that I want to see:
Alice in Wonderland
Dear John (I'll bring the tissues lol)
Hot Tub Time Machine
Monday, January 18, 2010
I woke up the other day with that feeling in the pit of my stomach. That feeling that I haven't had in weeks, probably months to be honest. It was you, the horrible aching uneasiness that I have come to associate with thoughts of you, or how things used to be. My first thought was, "dammit I've been doing so good, why is this happening now?" Then I realized there had to be a reason I was feeling this way. I've been doing too well here lately, amazing actually.
So for two days I sat on the idea and finally figured out what I think is happening.
I don't miss you.
It feels really good to be able to say that and know that it's the truth.
I miss intimacy. I'm not talking about sex.
Webster's defines it as "something of a personal or private nature."
Wikipedia claims it to be "the feeling of being in a close personal association and belonging together." (personally, i think the second half of that is pretty dead-on)
And of course because it's one of my favorite websites and inventions ever....Urbandictionary.com defines it as: a euphemism for having sex, the example given was "Assuming that both parties are into it, intimacy is the one time when peeps like to have their personal space invaded". Well done Urbandictionary, but only thanks to the example.
I'm talking about:
-laying next to someone and just feeling close to them
-a hand on my hip out of concern for my safety or guiding me in a better direction
-just knowing someone else is there that cares about you, they can be on the other side of the room but with just a warm glance you feel it
-a warm hand resting on my leg during a movie
-spooning...but not just because you are in bed together and feel you should...because it just happens, your bodies just fit that way and you feel at peace once you get into that position
-connecting mentally with someone, completely differently than you can connect with everyone else in the room, this person just "gets" you
-being able to tell someone something with just your eyes
-comfort....(and this is debatable by many people) but i enjoy the maximum amount of comfort..I'm talking peeing with the door open talking about your day kinda comfort, showering together and washing each other's back without even asking, just outta habit kinda comfort
-having someone know how you feel that day without you even telling them, and oftentimes without you knowing it yourself (example-giving you a hug when you didn't even know you needed it or picking up the slack around the house when you're a bit overwhelmed)
There are a million other things I can think of and will probably post more as I do.
So..Intimacy... (in the words of incubus)
"would i be out of line if i said, i miss you?"
Thursday, January 14, 2010
This isn't meant towards anyone in particular. I just couldn't pass it up when I saw it because I feel like people should consider what they say more before they say it...that's all.
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Some of my favorite quotes by Marilyn Monroe:
"I'm trying to find myself as a person, sometimes that's not easy to do. Millions of people live their entire lives without finding themselves. But it is something I must do."
" I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go. Things go wrong so that you can appreciate them when they're right. You believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."
"A wise girl kisses but doesn't love, listens but doesn't believe, and leaves before she is left."
"I am not interested in money. I just want to be wonderful."
"I don't know how invented high heels, but all women owe him a lot."
"Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring."
"If you can make a girl laugh, you can make her do anything."
"It's not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on."
"I restore myself when I'm alone."